Softies

792: 

If I, as a vegan, wear my heart on my sleeve, if I’m thought to be soft-hearted, then how does that go down with non-vegans?

            Perhaps it’s like wearing a misfit-badge. In our society, life’s difficult for softies; the softy is constantly being put down. Softies attempt to win admiration for being gentle, etc, but in doing so we only slide deeper into the trap. All the time we spend trying to achieve difficult things seems to be wasted when nobody else notices. I imagine that music bands are always looking for that, and are rarely satisfied playing just for the sake of making the music they love. Similarly, vegans who aren’t recognised for what they are doing are rarely indifferent to being ignored by others. If no one is listening to us or talking with us about something we feel strongly about and which we proudly practise, then maybe we start to boast about it (“shame on you - look what I am doing”). These are the tactics of the desperate. Pushy vegans and boastful vegans always fail to make an impression.

            It’s probably indistinguishable to the outsider, boasting and being pushy. It’s such a big turn-off. (In Australia, rule-number-one is to never ‘big-note’ yourself). It shows a lack of self-assurance when we’re boasting, as if we do it to get noticed, and then to be approved of. In this way, when we try to force approval, we get the very opposite. We seek recognition and wind up ‘milking’ a compliment. Our need for others to recognise us, praise us or even emulate our example, whether by way of blackmail or persuasion, is too obvious.

            There’s a central principle at stake here. However much we want to touch a person’s heart or mind, if we have no permission it won’t work. In fact, no amount of self-justification is a ticket to enter. The biggest danger is that when we’re rebuffed we might resort to insults.

            If, in the public perception, we are ever to amount to anything beyond being food freaks, it will have to be for our contribution to peace-making, and that comes with our having the courage of our convictions. No one’s going to say “You’re doing a great job”, especially if they’re not vegan themselves. If we have a problem with our morale needing a boost it’s probably going to have to come from within.

            Look at it this way, we’re lucky to have stumbled on this philosophy-of-the-future, we’re lucky to be outraged by social injustice, and we’re exceptionally fortunate to be sensitive and empathetic towards enslaved animals. That must be enough for us, because we can never expect to get admiration for who we are from non-vegans.