Strategy

264:

Does Animal Rights need a communication upgrade? As a vegan I have my own weakness, judgementalism, and I think it applies to other advocates in the movement. This is a problem I admit I have and I think it needs to be addressed rigorously if only to keep it in check. I’d liken it to a weakness amongst the animal-eating masses, in their habit of condoning the killing and eating of animals, which also needs to be kept in check. It’s a weakness, and that’s all it is. My judgement habit is similarly a weakness, and I see it for that, but ONLY that.
I’d recommend to myself that I show no rancour, no disrespect and no value judgements. I won’t win anyone’s long term commitment by inducing guilt or fear in them. Only by showing I respect them and am interested in their welfare can I ever hope to keep them on side. Apart from my wanting to be warm with people, it’s to our strategic-advantage to do things this way round (i.e. without the finger-wagging).
Let’s say we are talking together, you and I. If you look at my face, you’ll pick up how I’m feeling – either I’m relating to you non-judgementally (I’ll be giving off signals that I like you or I accept you) or I’m being judgemental (I’ll be signalling disapproval and worse). I may not want to BE judgemental but that’s overridden by my insecure ego, or me wanting to show off my high standards. I may be prepared to risk our whole relationship, just for the sake of letting you know how ‘clean’ I am and how ‘dirty’ I think you are. I’ll gamble on this: that you’ll find my honesty trumps any attempt to deceive you about how I really feel.
If I’m being judgemental it’s all about values, mine and yours. It’s about me needing to establish my credentials, showing I have something to say and establishing my right to say it. If I express a moral judgement (aimed at you) it’s quite likely you’ll take offence.
Judgement: what is it? The hot flame touched by the child is judged hot – it’s evidence-based and to the older child self evident. Value-judging is different. When I assess your values, my subjective statement might be saying that my values are better than yours. Maybe I don’t exactly think that but since we’re all very sensitive about such things it’s likely it will come across that way.
My judging of you may not necessarily be fair or carefully researched, but I may feel compelled to show it, in order to make my position clear. In a clumsy way I’m hoping that the shock of showing the strength of my judgement (especially if I appear to be hiding it) will ‘wake you up’.
In the school playground the same thing happens. You insult me and I punch you in the face before I’ve thought it through. It’s a powerful moment. My judgement is quick, clear and almost primeval. I dislike what you did and I’m showing it before I’ve given myself time to make a more considered response ... which I quickly calculate will therefore be a less effective one.
When I’m judging you it might be almost that automatic. Each day we make decisions without taking the trouble to consider them more carefully. Perhaps that’s because we don’t have enough time or patience. I sometimes think and act almost simultaneously, instinctively liking or disliking, to suit the occasion. When it comes to straight-talking it might not be such a bad thing ... if my friends come to know me as a straight-speaker. But if I haven’t thought about it carefully enough, I may still be trying to use the shock-and-attack approach ... even not caring about others’ feelings … setting off a whole train of insensitivity, which adds up to one gigantic, strategic mistake.
So where does that leave me? Perhaps, strategically, needing to be very careful about straying into the mine field of making value judgements.