Guarded curiosity

1535: 

I’d like to stand on a soap box, with microphone in hand, in front of a crowd of eager listeners, and speak my heart out.  But those days of soap box oratory are dead.  Today, we need to communicate in a more intimate way, in one-to-one conversations, about a whole range of related issues.  So, when talking casually-almost, when this subject of animal-use comes up (not necessarily introduced by us) our first words will probably set the tone of the whole conversation.

It’s obvious that vegans do significant things that others don’t do. That might provoke an interest.  I’m in luck if it does.  The conversation might go something like this:

“You’re a vegan then?”

“Yes”

“Why?”

“It’s something I feel passionately about”

         

If ever I get this far I’m usually tempted to go into too much detail, but that isn’t necessarily what anyone wants to hear, especially if it sounds as though I’m using their enquiry to start big-noting myself, bragging about my superior ethics.  As soon as ‘my passion’ is mentioned, I look like an animal-liberationist whose epithets they've heard so many times before.  In future, they’ll regret asking for fear of being bored witless.  Maybe they try to change the subject.  And soon enough we're talking about the weather, and then climate change, and then ... anything but the animal issues I'd hoped to start talking about.  This is the reason for not showing our hand too soon.

The conversation could go another way, where we meet provocation, first up:

“You’re what?” (said with mock surprise, implying madness, and meant to put me on the defensive).

Or, it could go another way, in a show of guarded interest:

“y….e .. s.  Go on” (hoping to pounce on my first foolish statement, so they can then go in for the kill).

So I'd prefer a more 'negative pitch' (sales lingo) and try to coax them into thinking I'm a bit vulnerable or a bit innocent - if I don’t seem too eager, then it’s not hard to lure almost anyone into asking me to explain myself.  And that is the original why-are-you-vegan question I really wanted to answer in the first place.

It often clear that there are curiosity and protection strategies going on here.  We see it all the time when it comes to animal-eating - people's need to justify themselves.  We also notice how people want to put a dampener on our righteousness, whilst at the same time wanting to find out things.  They’re curious.  But guarded.  We can never tell how curious people might be, or how genuine their curiosity, nor can we afford to waste any opportunity.

         

We need to be prepared to say what we stand for, and why, saying what we want to say confidently yet casually, informingly yet non-confrontationally – answering in such a way that leaves the other person interested and better informed, but not put off and NOT out-manoeuvred.