Forcing you to agree - the judgement trap

1557: 

Most people know approximately how vegans see their world.  But are vegans out to convert others?  And are there other values a vegan has, which make them extra-civilised, as people.

           

If we think of ourselves as being (vegan) pretty much how everyone should be, and that we're RIGHT morally and health-wise, we might not necessarily see what else we must be, if we're going into the persuasion business.  If I’m ‘in the right’, then I have to be extra vigilant about seeing my own faults and watching for traps, especially the judgement trap.  Otherwise I can deservedly be accused of being righteous, as if I’m looking down on people, or as if I’m 'better-than'.  It’s a classic trap - I might feel that others are wrong when they disagree with me.  If I can’t get people to agree with me then, maybe, I'm entitled to use value judgements in an attempt to force them to think my way.  If I’m 'right', I can therefore use whatever means are available to get you to be 'right' too.

If I attempt to judge someone’s values, is it not a subtle form of violence?  Even though, on the one hand, I’m bravely defending animals from being exploited, I can still also be violating people’s space and their freedom of choice.  It’s a dangerous road to travel.  Because free-will and choice are regarded by almost everyone as sacrosanct, and any attempt to circumvent that appears like a violation.  Over the ages free-will has been fought for and won.  We (here in the West) believe ourselves to be a ‘free-willed’ society.  We don’t want to lose that.

But then, along comes a vegan who seems to want to take that away.  “You are wrong, I am right, so this is what you must do”.

From an outsider’s point of view, there’s something threatening about any holier-than-thou people. One usually wants to bring them ‘down to size’.  Anyone who puts themselves forward and thinks themselves better, cleverer, wealthier, better looking or more righteous, automatically appears unattractive.  No one likes the self-satisfied.  And, by which time, no one is listening to what they have to say.

But, once you come across vegans who aren’t judgemental, then everything changes.  A vegan who doesn’t appear to be pushy or too overly persuasive is assessed very differently.  Sure, we may still run the risk of seeming to be too passive and therefore too easily ignored, but at least we won't be aggressively attacked.  But it's a balance.  We must never find ourselves going onto the defensive.  We can even afford a little old fashioned humility, and in that approach appear more self confident, leastways, to the extent of not becoming strident.

         

The theory might go something like this: sit back and enjoy advocating Animal Rights.  Who can complain when we give no one an excuse to get heavy with us?  It’s like watching a movie which speaks its message, but passively.  It doesn’t leap out and judge its audience.  Similarly, books don’t judge us.  We can chuck them out of the window if needs be.  The book won’t be offended.  Likewise, as vegans, we might ask questions but no one needs to answer them nor should they feel compelled to by being judged badly if they don’t.

         

So, we put up our arguments.  They go into circulation.  Maybe what we say causes a disturbance.  Perhaps we attract attention.  But in our own minds, where it really counts, surely we must know that we are NOT forcing the issue.