Two phobias

1188:

In some ways vego-phobia is not unlike homophobia, in that people are afraid of what they don’t know, afraid of the stereotype. For the vegphobes, a throwing in of their lot with ‘animally-people’. By eating an entirely different type of food - you can imagine the impact it has on daily life.  Going vegan is thought to be taking things too far, but by others it’s thought to be going-too-soft. That applies to sexuality as well. The stereotype for my own gender, for example, is the tough, steak-eating, woman-chasing, sport-loving, macho man. It’s cool to be hard, un-cool to be soft.  Amongst women I’m sure it’s just as weird, being gay or being vegan, or both!! But whichever minority we seem to belong to, there’s social phobia everywhere about us, fear of us, apprehension about us.

In our Western society, free as we are, we minorities still face the confident wall of the majority. It’s something we have to face. Misunderstandings and prejudice.

Now, don’t get me wrong, whilst I’m not suggesting that the human overpopulation-of-the-planet could be somewhat solved by encouraging people to explore their homo- or bi-sexual natures, thus reducing their reproductive impact, I am suggesting the ethics of the planet could be solved by encouraging people to explore their soft side.

This softness of character might be, but isn’t necessarily, anything at all to do with sexuality. It’s just the softness component inside us, just as ‘toughness’ might be for the pro-surfer, mastering the waves. But today, it’s starting to look as if ‘soft’ could become the new positive,  a new tuning-into the gentler side. Nothing very new about this, since men and women alike know how to be soft. As a parent of either gender might feel, when carrying the sleeping child upstairs to bed.

Man is hard, tough, wins wars, kills, but if those times are changing it doesn’t mean men aren’t as tough, just not so needing to show off that side of themselves. Today, men are far less ashamed of being gentle.

This softness was a long time coming, perhaps because we blokes fear soft-heartedness. In the same way, we’re reluctant to develop our sensitivity, in case it all goes wrong; in case we go mad at the sight of so much darkness and not enough light.

Everyone is capable of sliding into depression, but anyone can light a spark too. If kids have spark in what they do (often unselfconscious) then we adults can spark too, when guarding the child, the cat, the vulnerable plant in the garden. We spark when protecting, simultaneously experiencing the sort of energy connected with that sort of good-feeling.

When we are getting nowhere with someone, we learn that most valuable of truths, that adults always put up obstacles. These are self-justified, locked gateways to change. They present one particular wall in front of all those seeking change - vegans, animal liberationists, humane research activists, plant-based eaters and advocates for non-violence. This is the wall we vegans specifically face concerning the notorious mind-set about animals.

Many people who are attracted by the opposite sex are confused by their own inability to understand why a person is gay - they’ve only ever been turned on by members of the opposite sex. For them their sexuality is natural (and incidentally shared by all animals), they’ve never questioned it or had cause to. Many people are equally confused by vegans, who seem overly-sensitive – in fact, sensitive enough and empathising enough with animals, to refrain from eating them. And, to keep it up for ever onwards. It’s simply beyond their ‘ken’. And if they appear confused, so be it. These are early days. Are you feeling impatient? Then swallow it. Get used to change going at snail’s-pace.

But look on the optimistic side: today many heterosexual women and men show complete acceptance of homosexuals, with no trace of homophobia. And similarly, those enthusiastic meat-eaters show acceptance and even admiration for the stance we take, regarding animal cruelty.