641:
If five years olds accept meat-eating you can’t blame them,
if a fifteen year old still accepts it you might be more worried, and if a 25
year old is still ‘doing’ it, well, even then perhaps there’s still a chance
they’ll change but by then it might be too late. They might have recently left
their parents’ dinner table and started shopping for their own food,
experimenting on all sorts of levels, ethical eating being but one of them.
Older carnivores are probably
beyond the pail. Things have gone too far, with too many worldly pressures and
commitments bearing down on them. And later still, radical food changes are
even less likely.
To older
people vegans are probably just weird. This makes it doubly hard for us to
persuade them. They may see veganism as nonsense and prefer watching drunks
throwing up on footpaths than having to listen to vegans. If they did have to
listen, they might be disturbed enough to go rushing to the fridge for a
pick-me-up (the fridge acting as our own kitchen drug store, full of remedies
for soothing and satisfaction). Older people usually have settled views on this
whole animal ‘thing’ and won’t willingly enter into any conversation about it.
They’ll steer away from all animal talk (or divert it to ‘pet-talk’) in order
to avoid the trap of talking about animal husbandry or veganism, with a vegan.
On a personal level I’ve never
felt any open hostility, but others have. We might not be liked or even being
talked with, not about killing animals for food anyway. To them this is a taboo
subject.
As vegans, if we attempt to barge
through this barrier we can alter the whole basis of our relationship with
someone. Mentioning our obvious differences (of ethical perspective) is like
making a physical attack. An omnivore might talk about anything, reveal the
most personal secrets about themselves, but they’ll usually refuse to go
anywhere near ‘personal eating habits’ when it refers to any diet based on
ethics. The mention of compassion involves powerful emotions - mention it too
much and it intimidates people. I’d say it’s less destructive the less it’s
mentioned.
What? Keep silent? No, but
understatement can be more powerful than too many words. In one way, silence can
be valid, since we’re dealing here with 'truth-force' (satyagrahya) and it has
to be handled with care and respect. It means that we, as vegans, should
practise compassion on all levels, on people too. It’s too easy to offend
people and for them to be ‘once bitten twice shy’.
Every day the world eats meat and
there are billions more deaths, billions more animals being purpose-bred to
suffer. There’s been an accumulation of
insult and damage inflicted on animals. Cruelty is now routine, and carried out
almost unconsciously. It isn’t perceived by the mass of the population because
it is all hidden away – the worst happens in the hell holes they call ‘farms’,
or today referred to as ‘operations’; as farming intensification increases they
are known as ‘intensive operations’ and less referred to as ‘farms’.
What is so insidious is that
these factory farms guarantee to feed vast numbers of people at the lowest
possible cost to the consumer. The law allows the governments to protect the
owners of these places, to ensure the population is fed.
For us, as advocates for animals,
there’s no point in blaming the farmer or the government or the overseas
competitor. The only constructive thing to do is promote a boycott and
encourage ‘cruelty-free’ products to come onto the market. But to generate that
momentum we need to promote that idea of actively boycotting. And for that we
must talk, and talking might just be the problem here. This is where we most
often shoot ourselves in the foot. So, sometimes it’s best we hold back, or
rather, work quietly.
It’s a complex mixture of approaches
(a little teasing here, ignoring the whole matter there, sometimes stirring,
sometimes ending a conversation as it gets too close to the edge – it’s a
matter of pushing forwards and pulling back, of taking the initiative in each
situation.
We’ll only be taken seriously
when we can show as much sensitivity to the human as we would expect from them
towards the animals. If one instinctively thought it inappropriate to discuss
this subject, then changing the subject might be best; it might lose ‘an opportunity’,
but we can respond appropriately to a non-opportunity. Sometimes I terminate a
discussion because I don't want to encourage talking about this in a half
hearted or light-hearted or frivolous way.
Each approach has its right
timing and a variety of approaches keeps ‘them’ guessing, and hopefully keeps
what we’re saying interesting and not too predictable.
I always feel that I can say
anything I want to say, as long as I’m being compassionate with the person I’m
talking to. My own compassionate nature should stop me wanting to hurt another
person. What I really want is the others’ trust. Get that and I can talk more
freely. Obviously, trust has to be earned, and if I screw up on that, if I fail
to get permission-to-talk, it simply looks like I’m squaring up for a quarrel.
And they will not only shut me out but when you come along they’ll shut you out
too.