Getting caught up in arguments

When we meet an adversary and discuss our opposite views concerning the eating of animals, we are at a disadvantage because we hold such a minority view. It’s almost impossible to win our argument if our opponents feel supported by the dominant culture and feel the need to establish their position.
For those of us not blessed with brilliant wit, if we try making hasty responses we usually blow it. We see an attack coming out of left-field, it’s distinctly personal in tone and seems like a challenge. In other words, there’s no indication that a fair-minded debate is about to start, quite the opposite in fact. A simple comment couched as a joke shows a clear intention to be humorous. And since the whole point of a joke is to be in and out in a flash, there’s no prospect of a detailed discussion starting up.
This comment, fired off at ‘joke’ level, is sharp and not to be shrugged off. But it’s difficult to respond without giving an aggressive reply … and in that split second, as we bite back, we know we’ve been trapped. We’ve been manipulated – it was really our aggressive response that was meant to be the coup de grace of the ‘joke’. That’s what ‘turns’ the atmosphere. It’s us (vegans) who are made to look bad, as if we took things further than necessary. It’s they (the joking carnivore) who are outraged at the thought that their comments could be taken so personally. “It was meant as a joke”. “You’ve no sense of humour”.
By taking umbrage, by turning a bit of light hearted banter into something offensive, we show how ready we are to quarrel over this issue. It’s proof (to carnivores) that we’re not really compassionate people, nor socially cool, nor as non-violent as we say we are. We look like losers, who seem to have gentle views about animals but not about people. They win!!